I read some information on proposition 2, that Texas overwhelmingly passed last year. One of the arguments for this amendment to the Texas constitution was a fear that same sex marriages would undermine traditional marriage. If you believe this to be true or not is not my concern. What I want to write about are some dangers to marriage. I have been married for over twenty-five years. I also have counseled more troubled married couples then I can remember. Some of these marriages survived and far too many of them didn’t. Given these two facts I think I have the right to speak on the matter.

The greatest danger to marriage is me. My selfishness, my hard heartedness, my childishness, my hard headedness does more damage and subjects my marriage to more danger then anything else I know of.

My counseling experience has taught me some deep truths when it comes to marriage. The foremost of these is that selfishness is at the heart of all marital problems. More often then I want to remember, I’ve had to tell a couple whose marriage was in danger of falling apart, one of you two has to grow up. It would be great if you both did but if there is to be any hope one of you has to. Child like selfishness lies at the heart of every divorce.

Jesus taught that it’s what’s inside a man that corrupts him not what’s outside. The same is true of marriage. The greatest danger’s a marriage faces comes from inside the two participants, not from some outside force. Greed, jealousy, anger, bitterness, frustration and hatred are some of the internal forces that threaten a marriage. When we get serious about dealing with the internal problems we have, then and only then, will marriage be able to cope with any external pressures that might come along.